Shocking news out of South Ossetia, Georgia today as the Russian Ministry of Defence has released an official statement regarding photos circulating on the internet implicating the deployment of MMA champion and advanced super battledroid, Fedor Emelianenko, in the 2008 South Ossetia War.
According to the statement, Fedor Emelianenko was attached to the distinguished Russian 58th Army and spearheaded the retaking of the South Ossentian captial, Tskinval, from ethnic Georgian forces who had entered the city 2 days prior. Apparently, Fedor upon arrival preceeded to beat ten types of shit out Georgian ground forces, grew indifferent and abruptly left to holiday in Sharm al-Sheik Egpyt leaving mopping up actions to the 58th.
(A blast from Fedor's eye lasers leave this Georgian T-72 a burnt out husk.)
(Fedor proposes opening another front against the Georgians through Abkhazian territory.)
Fedor's deployment has sent shockwaves throughout EU and American military circles leaving Brussels and Washington scrambling for countermeasures against this radically advanced war-fighting asset and super-king.
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